Seinfeld's New York

This article that was recently featured on nycgo.com won my heart for two reasons. One, it's fantastic - a list of the New Yorkiest "Seinfeld" episodes and an informal itinerary of all the "real" city locations in each episode. (Lunch with the soup nazi! Stay at the Plaza!) And two, the article's writer actually used to work for me at the Mayor's Office, during my absolute most favorite years I spent there. He was a joy to have on my team of super wordsmiths, and I was delighted to see his creativity and sense of humor are still intact.

Also, Elaine's face in the above photo is pretty much my expression every time I ride the subway.

Enjoy!

*Photo courtesy of Sony Pictures Television

Popsicle, anyone?

Whew, it's hot out there. Wouldn't you love a French 75 (champagne, gin, lemon) popsicle right now? I'm thinking of making these tomorrow, and maybe these peach and Greek yogurt ones for the tots.

Also, if you're visiting the Highline this weekend, stop by and grab a paleta (a Mexican popsicle!) from the very talented and sweet Fany, who owns La Newyorkina. Evan and I used to live off her paletas - which come in amazing flavors like mango with chile, cucumber lime, and horchata - when Girl Next Door Baked Goods was up and running at the Hester Street Fair.

*Photos courtesy of reclaimingprovincial.com, chocolateandcarrots.com, and lanewyorkina.com

Bee is for Brandon: A buzzworthy first birthday party

One of the great things about being a new mother (besides, you know, the unconditional love and stuff) is that you often meet a whole slew of other new parents - some that you're convinced you'd never be friends with if not for the pooping machines you're both holding, and some that are awesome.

Sam falls into the latter group. She's warm, easy to like, and a lot of fun - made clear by this adorable bee-themed first birthday party she threw for her son, Brandon, earlier this month.

Sam did most of the creating herself, including the invitation, the tissue paper pom-poms, and the little jars of honey (she used recycled baby food jars - genius!).

Aren't these bumble bee cake pops just perfect? I know the amount of patience that goes into making something like this, and usually it's not what one has left over after taking care of a toddler all day!

My favorite part of this fete just might be the homemade pineapple "cake."  Brandon was born with a disorder called Prader Willi Syndrome, which has various symptoms, the primary ones being a very slow metabolism and inability for your body to realize that it's full. Sam's little family is committed to living a healthy lifestyle to help keep Brandon well; I think it's a testament to Sam's strength and huge heart that she came up with such a fun, healthy way to celebrate her little boy's first birthday. And doesn't the "cake" look like a beehive? So cute.

Brandon's a lucky guy to have Sam for a mom. This is seriously one of the sweetest parties I've ever seen.

And, as coincidence would have it, May is Prader Willi Syndrome Awareness Month. If you're interested in learning more about the disorder, or would like to get involved in increasing awareness and research, please visit www.fpwr.org.

Dan and Yasmine's wedding weekend

Our friends Dan and Yasmine were married in the Catskills over Memorial Day weekend. Despite the unseasonably chilly weather, it was a beautiful wedding, hosted by one of the most loving couples I know. Dan is an old high school buddy of Evan's, and for the ten-plus (eek!) years I've been in Evan's life, I've considered him a close friend. Yasmine and I just met about two years ago, but we hit it off immediately. Evan and I felt so lucky to be able to share these wonderful moments with them. 

The rehearsal dinner and reception were held in an amazing barn with soaring ceilings adorned with huge Chinese lanterns. Nellie and Jack were in awe.

The twins got to run around a lot at the very laid back rehearsal dinner - great because we'd had them strapped in their car seats for over three hours. Jack's obsessed with balls these days (future Red Sox player? I think so...!) and he found the large, open barn a great space to practice his throwing and chasing.

Nellie wouldn't stay away from the twinkly lights that were hanging under the bar. I think she'd agree that all of the varied lighting made the room look magical.

The meal at the rehearsal dinner was a delicious BBQ: hot dogs, brisket, salads.

I made Girl Next Door treats for dessert - traditional brownies, cheesy (goat cheese) brownies, husband bait (raspberry shortbread bars), and blondies. Did I get a photo of any of it? No, of course not! Grumble...

The weather cleared up for the wedding itself, which made me really happy - I know how much Dan and Yasmine were looking forward to an outdoor ceremony. It was still pretty cold, and J and N were just emerging from a nap, so I skipped the ceremony and hung out with them inside the barn. I snagged some ceremony photos from a friend...it was just too beautiful not to share.

Another gorgeous shot of the beautiful bride and her flower girl, Dan's sweet niece:

I wasn't great about taking photos at the reception...there was a lot of toddler wrangling going on ("no, no, Jack, you can't try to knock over the band's speakers..."). I wish I'd gotten a shot of the cake, which matched the rustic barn theme and tasted wonderful. There were carrot cake tiers and dark chocolate tiers and Evan brought me a small slice of each (if you remember from this post, I left a bit early to put the kids to bed). But I think it's clear that it was just a gorgeous event, and we had a blast. 

Congratulations Dan and Yasmine!

*Ceremony photo and photo of bride and flower girl by Emily Stern.

Twin Tuesdays: Eight rules for traveling with toddlers

We just got back from a lovely wedding weekend in the Catskills (pics tomorrow!) - Jack and Nellie's first wedding and our first time bringing them anywhere without a family member to put the adult-to-kid ratio in our favor. We danced, we ate, we played peek-a-boo; yes, it was all fun and games until two babies decided they'd rather sleep with mom and dad than in their pack n plays. Here's an unofficial list of our rules for traveling with toddlers (by car...we haven't flown with them, yet!):

1. Travel at night or during naps. When J and N were teeny, we learned quickly that the best time to drive up to my visit my family in Boston was after we'd "put them to bed" in their car seats. It almost always makes for seamless travel. If traveling at night isn't going to work, we leave just before nap time. J and N are down to one nap now, and the trip up to the Catskills fit perfectly into their schedule. We strayed from this idea twice in their lives and let's just say we got to know the rest stops along I-95 reallllly well.

2. Keyword: early. Get started on packing early. (We didn't do this for Catskills trip and there was a lot of scrambling on Saturday morning...especially because I decided to color my hair that day. Not recommended.) Pack up the car early. (We usually do a lot of it the night before.) Leave early. (Plan to. Because then you'll end up leaving on time.) The early bird catches the worm...or in this case, the early bird maintains her sanity.

3. Pick your battles. At home, we have pretty set rules about eating (three meals, one if-necessary snack), sleeping (in their own cribs for the night at 7:30 p.m.), schedules (J and N have been on the same exact schedule since day one), screen time (very, very limited unless mama needs a second or dada needs to watch the Daily Show while ironing his pants), and pacifiers (only for sleeping and riding in the car). But if we're on a trip and the only way to calm them down is to let them eat Cheddar Bunnies in our bed while watching HGTV, then so be it. That's why they call it vacation.

4. Be prepared! (But don't overdo it.) We have two toddlers, so it's hard to miss us when we roll into town. It would be super easy for us to take over a couple dozen square feet of space wherever we go, if we didn't pare down. Again, we learned from experience...the first time we visited my parents with the twins, we didn't use 99% of the stuff we brought (this includes the 857 outfits we thought were necessary for our three night stay). Try to develop a sense of exactly what your babies need when you go out of town - their blankies, sippy cups, one or two favorite toys, a new (or travel-only) toy for those moments when you need to bring out the big guns, a full diaper bag, one or two extra outfits just in case, etc. I am proud to say that it only took us 14 months to finally get it right...ok, well, to get this part right. (See #2...)

5. Manage your expectations. This one sort of goes without saying, but it's so hard to follow. For this particular trip, Evan and I totally expected meltdowns and early departures from the wedding; we actually planned for it and had contingencies set up just in case. So we were pleasantly surprised when Saturday's rehearsal dinner went off without a hitch and the twins had the time of their life. On Sunday, I did leave the wedding "early" with J and N (around 9 p.m.) but it was something we'd discussed beforehand, so it was fine. We weren't expecting perfection, so we ended up having a great time and going with the flow.

6. Depend on the kindness of strangers...and those closest to you. I'm not great at asking for help, and my husband is even less so. But we've learned that you really can't take two toddlers on a trip without a little assistance. It's great when we visit family - there's always someone (aka, my mom and dad) on the other end to meet us and take care of Evan and I just as much as the twins. But if you look around, people are always willing to lend a hand, even if they're just helping you get through a door. There was a moment at the rehearsal dinner this weekend where I was holding a friend's nine-month-old (hey, pay it forward) and Evan was helping J and N eat their dinner when I laughed and said, "See! We could totally have another baby...we'd just have to bring all of them with us wherever we go." I was referring to Evan's guys and their wives and girlfriends, who helped us get through the weekend by entertaining the babies, carrying stuff for us, and bringing us wine whenever we needed it. I felt like it was the first time neither Evan nor I said "no" to any offer to help, and it just made everything go so much smoother.

7. Don't forget the gear. Comfy car seat and stroller that folds down to fit in your glove compartment? Check. We also recommend portable high chairs, like our Inglesina Fast Chair that we're completely obsessed with. We've used it everywhere - grandparents' house, restaurants, rest stops, wedding reception. It clips onto the table and is comfortable and sturdy. And I like that it puts toddlers at a better height than those wooden restaurant high chairs. My friend Emily recommends taking your iPad and queueing up some Sesame Street. Great for the car and as a distraction when you're trying to pack at the hotel and someone starts to hate hanging out in the pack n play. We make sure to bring our white noise machine and the baby monitor - which we don't even use at home anymore, but it can really come in handy when your toddler is sleeping in a "strange" place.

8. Milk, water, and Cheerios. Yes, you're probably going to have a cranky babe on your hands if this is all they consume all day. But if you're not going too far off the grid (we were in the mountains with no cell phone reception and it worked for us) and you only remember these three items (you can substitute Cheerios for another easy-to-pack snack), your toddler will survive until the next meal, even if it's a little later than they normally eat. Seriously, it will be fine.

What about you guys? Any brilliant tips to add? Where have you traveled with your toddler(s), anywhere good? We're dying to take them on a bigger trip. Maybe in the fall. Maybe when they're high school...

Dark n stormy

Stay tuned for the usual Twin Tuesday post later today. Until then, doesn't this look delicious? Recipe here.

Photo c/o esquire.com

Turkey meatloaf

Ground turkey breast is one of those versatile foods that's great to cook with because it's healthy and it takes on the flavor of whatever seasonings you use. I don't like to use turkey as a substitute for ground beef, though - if you want beef, use beef. Turkey is entirely different, and can be quite delicious.

Last week, I made Ina Garten's turkey meatloaf and it was fantastic (I professed my love for Ina in this post; I've never met an Ina recipe I didn't like). Jack and Nellie couldn't get enough - lean ground meat is a great first food as well as an excellent toddler meal - and I kept stealing little bites off their plates because I could hardly wait to eat a piece at adult dinner time. 

The trick is adding a lot of moisture; ground turkey is pretty dry. This recipe calls for sauteed onions mixed with worcestershire sauce, tomato paste, and chicken stock. Bread crumbs (I used panko, see photo above) and eggs are a given in most meatloaf recipes. Add a little thyme, salt, and pepper, and yum yum yum. I like it best the next day, as a sandwich with some extra ketchup:

Here are a few more turkey meatloaf recipes to try: this one uses a mix of light and dark meat, Martha Stewart's sounds perfect for fall, and this one uses homemade BBQ sauce. 

Also, this always makes me laugh.

Twin Tuesdays: How not to raise the next CEO of Abercrombie and Fitch

Lately I get this awful pit in my stomach whenever I read or watch bad news, especially when it's about kids. Whether it's Newtown, Boston, or now those poor people in Oklahoma, if a child is hurt, I feel it from the pit in my stomach to an almost tingling sensation in my fingers and toes. My mind automatically goes to this place: what if that happened to Nellie or Jack? I can see their faces in every picture of every child who's been harmed. I have to quickly think of something else because the feeling is just too difficult.

But I'm sorry to say that, I get that unnerving sensation reading other, significantly less tragic news; most recently, over the comments the CEO of Abercrombie and Fitch made about wanting only "cool kids" to wear his clothes - even going as far to stop selling women's clothes in sizes larger than 10. After rolling my eyes and thinking, so glad I haven't worn Abercrombie since high school, I got the familiar pit in my stomach. Yes, I'm not in high school anymore, my feelings about myself are no longer defined by how I look on a given day, but now I have a son and a daughter. And what if they're not the cool kids and they someday feel discriminated against or made fun of? What if they feel alone and ugly, embarrassed or unworthy - like I'm sure many kids felt hearing these statements.  Or...what if they're the ones doing the discriminating? What if somehow they grow up thinking it's ok to put people in categories - cool or weird, better or worse? What if they think it's ok to trample on people who might be different from them, because they think different is bad?

Evan and I always talk about what kind of people we want Nellie and Jack to be. Kind but confident enough to stand up for themselves. Independent but humble enough to ask for help. Happy, loving, curious. I never think, oh and I hope they're good looking or I hope they're popular; as a mother (and, I guess, a decent person in general?) it's more like, I hope they take care of themselves and I hope that they have at least one good friend to be with them through both the stormy and summer days of childhood and adolescence.

I think about Abercrombie's CEO...he was once a kid. What did (or didn't) his parents teach him that made him feel the need to publicly belittle other people? And how do I avoid doing that to my own kids? How do you instill in children the confidence to be the best they can be, while also teaching them them that it doesn't mean that they are intrinsically better than anyone else? How do I bottle their current state of blissed-out, you're-cool-as-long-as-you-don't-take-my-ball-away toddlerhood?

Today we're just going to keep on keeping on. Leading by lighthearted example. It's easy now, Jack and Nellie are 14 months old. I hope when they're 14 years, they're just as happy, whether they feel the need to wear overpriced khaki cargo pants or not. Here's hoping we can do as well as Ellen Degeneres's parents; she wins the good person award, yet again:



P.S. Looking for ways to help Oklahoma victims? Here are some suggestions. 

Weekend

It rained ALL DAY yesterday here in Brooklyn, so we spent the entire time indoors, chasing one another around the living room, reading the same animal book over and over again, and eating roast chicken and brussels sprouts. It was the first day in Jack and Nellie's whole life that we kept them in pjs from morning till bath time; even when they were newborns, I insisted on changing their clothes during the day, no matter what. Evan and I got a few things done around the apartment, like laundry and hanging this poster that we bought in February, but mostly we just played with the babes. It felt good to be cozy and lazy.

But on Saturday...we went went to Costco. It was the first time we've gone in about two years (last time, I was pregnant and distinctly remember getting sick in their restroom) so it was Jack and Nellie's very first time there. They thought it was pretty awesome - look below at Jack inspecting the soaring ceilings, Nellie making friends with another shopper who was admiring her cuteness.

Now, those of you who don't live in NYC aren't really going to get the whole trip to Costco being an insane weekend adventure thing. You probably just go to Costco, get what you need, leisurely pay for it, and go home. At the Costco in Brooklyn, you need to get there early, or you might not get a parking space (the last time we attempted a shopping trip there, we drove right past because there was a line to get into the lot!) and you'll be battling about twice as many people than were there when the doors open. Though honestly, like most other things in NYC, it's always crowded, no matter when you go. It wore me out.

Jack and Nellie were great until the very end, when it was about a half hour past nap time and they'd only had string cheese and Costco samples for lunch (mommy fail...). We ended up driving around while they napped, stopping to get Vietnamese sandwiches at Hanco in Cobble Hill, and then making our way to Smorgasburg for some s'mores pie from Butter and Scotch.

One random funny thing I noticed when we were heading to Smorgasburg: we live near a large Orthodox Jewish community and whenever we drive to Williamsburg, we often see their large families out and about. On Saturday, it seemed that the dads were on kid duty (I'm not sure why - Evan thought perhaps the women were at service?) and although they were dressed in completely solemn, traditional outfits and looking like a much different culture than our own, I noticed that the dads had that familiar, stereotypical lenient attitude I've seen in Evan, my dad, and others I know well. We saw one group of children, including a small child pushing a baby stroller, and it seemed like there were no parents in sight. But then I saw two men walking at a much slower pace behind them, chatting; it looked like a scene from a "Daddy Daycare"-type movie, except the dads were wearing large fur hats and black clothing. Perhaps dads are a little, ahem, looser than moms in most cultures and communities? (I say this all with a wink and a smile, of course. I honestly don't know what I'd do without World's Greatest Dad Evan Hill-Ries.)

So now that it's Monday, I'm gearing up for a busy few weeks. Next weekend, our friends Dan and Yasmine are tying the knot in the Catskills, and I'm doing some baking this week for their rehearsal dinner bbq on Saturday. I can't wait! Our own wedding anniversary is coming up in early June, and we have a trip to Boston planned soon after. All good, happy things, but busy busy busy.

How was your weekend? Was it raining where you live? Any exciting shopping trips?

Dearie

Have you read Dearie? I'm dying to - it's a biography of Julia Child, who I obviously adore. I loved My Life in France so much, and I was actually thinking of reading it again. It's full of optimism and spirit, and wonderfully written. I hope Dearie conveys that same joie de vivre.

Maybe I'll pick up a copy of the book this weekend. Or I could buy the e-book...but that just isn't the same, don't you think? Am I the last one to convert to paperless readers??

Lentils redux

My friend Emily claims she's not a great cook, but I think she has amazing instincts when it comes to food. The other day we were having sushi at her place, and she whipped us up a side salad of chopped cucumber, avocado, and pomegranate seeds - delicious and the perfect complement to our lunch. She just shared this super simple and healthy recipe with me that she makes once a week for her husband and tot daughter, Willow, one of Jack and Nellie's BFFs. I know you'll love it, too!

Cook two packets of these lentils (from Costco!) as directed. 

Emily adds a can of kidney beans and a sprinkling of chia seeds to boost the healthy and filling quotient. Chick peas would also be tasty.

Serve 'em up with some quinoa, brown rice, jasmine rice, barley, whatever you have on hand! Emily pairs the lentils with roasted veggies - I would love it with some cauliflower tossed with a little curry powder. Turn up the heat with some sriracha or sweeten it with some chutney (or both!). Yum - I can't wait to make this! 

Brownie in a mug

Have you ever watched the Barefoot Contessa on the Food Network?  The host, Ina Garten, always makes a point of saying "good" olive oil, "good" vanilla extract, etc. when she's going through her ingredients. Even though the internet sometimes makes fun of Ina for her insistent (and some might say snobby) ways, I believe she has a point (she's also one of my lifestyle idols, so to me, she's fabulous). Using high-quality ingredients is never a bad thing. You can feel good about cooking with them because "high-quality" often (though not always) means they're the real thing - so you're dealing with less chemicals and human tampering that often weaken food products. But most importantly, they just taste better.

Which brings me to this week's simple recipe: brownie in a mug. It's not haute cuisine, it's not an Ina Garten recipe, it's not even small-batch twee. Truth be told, it's a little ghetto. But sometimes you just need a brownie, and if you use good vanilla extract and good cocoa powder, then you'll end up with a delicious dessert in a pinch.

The recipe:

2 Tbs butter, melted
2 Tbs water
1/4 tsp good vanilla extract (I, like Ina, use Nielsen-Massey)
1 dash salt
2 Tbs good cocoa powder (I use Scharffen Berger)
3 Tbs sugar
2 Tbs flour

With a fork, mix the butter, water, vanilla and salt in a mug. Add cocoa powder, mix until combined. Do the same for the sugar, then the flour. Batter should resemble "real" brownie batter.

Cook on high in your microwave anywhere from 45-90 seconds. It took a few times in our super-powerful microwave to get it exactly right. The center should be a bit molten. And do follow the cardinal rule of brownie baking: don't overcook!

I imagine this would be great with a scoop of (good!) ice cream, but honestly if I had the ice cream, I probably wouldn't have attempted this in the first place.

Enjoy!

Kids Try Weird Foods

This hilarious video of toddlers trying weird foods - olives! anchovies! - for the first time really made my Friday. Although both Jack and Nellie have embraced olives and didn't balk at pickles, Jack's face when he first tried avocado killed me - he shuddered and looked at me like "what did you just make me eat??" (Sad because avocados are one of my favorite foods - and one of the easiest to prepare for babies. We're just going to have to keep trying.)

Also, this story is too funny.

Yum Gifts for Mom

Need some last minute gift ideas for Mother's Day? Here are some delicious ways to say "I love you mom" without having to procure a physical gift by Sunday. Just purchase online, print out a page from the website and stick it in a card.

Brooklyn Wine Exchange

Trust me on this one: moms need wine. The more the merrier. BWE has tiered membership packages and wines of the month clubs.

Murray's Cheese

The unsurpassed stinky store has a variety of classes, cheese and meat of the month clubs, and gift baskets that she won't mind receiving a few days late.

New York Mouth

Each month, mom will receive a themed basket (Cocktail Hour, Chocolate, Pickles) full of small-batch goodies made in NYC - including unique and devour-able popcorn from my pals over at Butter and Scotch.

Amazon.com Instant Movie 

Ok, this one isn't edible, but why not treat her to a viewing of foodie films Julie and Julia or Big Night? (Or both...you do have a lot of snacks to tide you over.) She'll love your company, and the movies are just so good.

Do you have any Mother's Day plans? Brunch? A quiet day at home? It's supposed to be a crummy Saturday here on the east coast, but we're hoping for a little sunshine on Sunday. Have a great weekend, everyone!

P.S. Credit where credit is due: all photos belong to their respective websites.

Winner, winner, chicken dinner

I am always thrilled to find one-pan dishes that are also delicious. It's like winning the recipe jackpot, isn't it? Because who has time to prepare a feast and wash 900 pans and prep bowls on a Wednesday?

This chicken bake by Jamie Oliver (remember when he was the Naked Chef?) is so easy and so tasty, I've made it twice this month. It's a hit with the grown-ups, as well as the toddlers; the chicken pulls right off the bone for tot-friendly pieces, and they can't enough of the bread bits (I served it to them with some halved grape tomatoes for an extra veggie punch). With tomato and basil season fast approaching, I'm planning on this being my go-to dish of the summer.

NOTE: This dish is great the next day, but it doesn't reheat well in the microwave, better to do it in the oven so everything doesn't get soggy. Also, I baked it at 375, not 350 (the recipe is written in Celsius but it converts to 350) and I still needed extra baking time to get the chicken and pancetta as crisp as I like. Of course, this may just be my sub-par NYC apartment oven.

Make this tonight, I promise you'll love it!

Twin Tuesdays - On Having Twins

We found out about our twosome at my eight week ultrasound, typically the first time the OBGYN will see you because "before that, we can't tell you much more than a store-bought test," the medical assistant who took my call informed me. The entire appointment is so fresh in my mind, it's hard to believe it was almost two years ago. Of course, the most life changing moment was when the doctor pointed to the ultrasound screen and said, "Do you see what I see? You have two babies in there." I was so nervous that I couldn't even cry - I wasn't ready to have that release yet - so I burst out laughing, almost a cackle. What. The...?

Twins? Really? Everyone was excited. My mom said that when she told my dad, who'd just come in from watering the grass, he had to sit down on our front stairs and catch his breath, he was so excited. My friend Nikki knocked over her wine glass at the restaurant where we were eating when I shared the news. And I was excited, too.

90 percent of the time, I was excited. 

But there was this part of me that was terrified, that didn't want twins, that just wanted a nice, normal pregnancy with one baby at the end of nine months. And last week, when I read this moving, spot-on post on the New York Times blog Motherlode, I felt compelled to finally talk about the 10 percent of me that was wondering (sometimes still is) how the hell did this happen?

It began with the obsessive internet searches about anything and everything that could go wrong during a twin pregnancy. First I was convinced I was going to lose one. Then I was certain that one was going to hog all the nutrients and the other would suffer. Then I knew - I just knew - I would deliver at 28 weeks and have to go through months of having babies in the NICU. I didn't want to worry about all this. I wanted to go to prenatal yoga and hire a doula and have an epidural-free delivery. Instead, I was reading about how if you try for a natural birth you might deliver one and then need an emergency c-section on the other.

My fears were not unwarranted: this stuff does happen to a lot of twins and twin moms. But many are also born full-term, full-sized, and healthy. And at 7lbs 10oz and 7lbs11oz respectively, Jack and Nellie were two of the lucky ones, born at almost 39 weeks.

For me, though, it went beyond typical pregnancy anxiety. Honestly, my initial thought after the shock wore off was, I couldn't do it. There was just no way. What did I know about motherhood? How would I handle two babies? I was worried that I'd never be able to bond with both of them, that something would be missing. I'd always imagined having one baby that I could cuddle with and take to baby yoga. But now, I pictured myself tearing my hair out as one nursed while the other screamed for food. How could I let my babies suffer like that??

And while that seems very dramatic, there have been moments where I was comforting one and couldn't attend to to the other, and they've been awful. But I've learned in the past 14 months that these moments are more awful for me than the babies. In the end, my bond with both of them is undeniably strong, and in those moments when I feel like I may have scarred them for life, they seem to only remember being comforted.

Now they're at the age where, if we'd had just one, Evan and I would be thinking about having another. We always wanted two children, close in age; we got our wish. And if I had a nickle for every time someone says to me "a boy and a girl, wow, you're done!" then, well, we'd be able to afford a third child. There are some fleeting moments when I feel that having twins "robbed" me of another pregnancy experience, or having kids with that sweet older sibling/younger sibling relationship.

Again, this is all my stuff, not theirs. They are as happy as can be with each other, and when I see how their sibling relationship is growing, my heart swells. Of course there are days when I still feel like I can't do it, like I'm failing, but if I stop to take a good hard look at my little family, I can shake those feelings off. It may have not been our grand plan, and most days are pretty tough, but we're doing just fine.